Keep Your Glass Slipper...I'd Rather Wear Flip-Flops

New tumblr post...

2011-09-05T17:58:00.002-04:00

....an interview with the world's best editor, Jennifer Bonnell.

Here's a link

Go to my Tumblr....

2011-08-08T23:23:00.001-04:00

...to read my new “INTERVIEWS WITH COOL PEOPLE I KNOW BECAUSE IT’S PAINFUL TO WRITE ABOUT MYSELF ON THIS THING” section.

Here's a link

I've got a Tumblr now.

2011-07-12T22:37:00.002-04:00

I figure it would be great to have another social networking thing that I don't update on a regular basis.
But seriously, I think the Tumblr is more my speed so I have high hopes for it.
You can see it (and follow me) by clicking here

I've figured out the secret to a happy life...

2011-06-27T22:43:00.008-04:00

Okay, fine, there's probably a bunch of secrets, but I've been thinking about one in particular. It's not even like it's a secret, as it's one of those things that you hear over and over and say "Yeah, yeah, I know" before completely disregarding it and going back to doing what you've always been doing and then wonder why you keep having the same experience over and over.

The particular secret I'm talking about here is the idea of expectations. Specifically, that when you have them - whether they be about a person or a place or a meal - you're setting yourself up for disappointment. Because, unfortunately, a lot of the time life (or people or places or meals) doesn't end up unfolding in the manner in which you wrote the script....So what happens is that not only are you upset because people aren't saying the right lines, but you're so CONFUSED about what's actually happening vs. what you've planned that you end up missing the whole experience. Which, a lot of the time, can sometimes prove to be even better than the script you wrote. With less typos.

The reason I've been thinking about this is because I recently bought my first house. Even though I'm already 42 years old and a lot of people I know bought their first houses like 10 years ago which was around the time I was walking away from my TV job and giving up a steady paycheck in order to write. And even though I was doing this really brave thing, it didn't feel like that at the time. What it felt like was that I HAD TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY LOST MY MIND and that not only was I not following the herd and moving closer to being a card-carrying responsible adult but that it would only be a matter of time before I couldn't pay my rent and I'd end up living in the alley behind my apartment with all my other homeless neighbors. (And even though I lived near very fancy Vogue-approve boutiques, there were a lot of them.)

If I were to be totally honest, the truth is that even after I started making money writing and stopped worrying about where I was going to get the shopping cart I'd be pushing around town after I lost my apartment, I had kind of given up on the idea of buying a house. Not just because I didn't think I'd ever be able to come up with a down payment, or even know how to begin the mortgage process (my mortgage broker Seth who has now become a friend once complimented me for being highly organized which I found hysterical because that's ridiculously far from the truth), but also because I was under the mistaken impression that houses were things you waited to buy with a husband or a wife or a partner or a significant other or whatever PC term one likes to use nowadays. So even though I wanted a house, there was this voice in the back of my mind that said "yeah, okay, but you can't do it alone - we'll talk about it when The-Guy-capital-T-capital-G comes along."

But the voice didn't say that I couldn't RENT one by myself, which is what I did. In the Hudson Valley, two hours north of the city, where I went every Friday-Sunday. And before I knew it, the area felt like home in a way that nowhere else ever had - not even Lost Angeles, which is a place I lived for seventeen years. And when that dreadful winter was over and spring arrived, I loved it even more, to the point where there was no question that when my lease was up at the end of August, I was going to renew it.

But then one day, in one of my attempts to avoid doing what I was supposed to be doing (ie. writing), I was perusing real estate listings. There's a lot of beautiful homes up there - homes that look like they belong in Pottery Barn catalogs or in movies directed by Nancy Meyers who did It's Complicated and Something's Gotta Give (and, who, incidentally wrote the movie Baby Boom which, when I tell people my story about going upstate, they all say "It sounds like Baby Boom. Maybe you'll end up with a vet who looks like Sam Shepard." Which, you know, wouldn't be the worst thing in the world seeing that I have two cats and will probably get a dog down the road.) And while those houses are all beautiful, they're not really me. They're too neat and perfectly put together and everything matches and while the owners say things like "Please--make yourself comfortable" you KNOW that the first thing they're going to do when you leave is rush over and fluff the pillows and wipe up the tiny drop of condensation that fell from your glass onto their coffee table as you took it off the coaster.

But as I perused (okay, fine--as I AVOIDED WRITING) I came across this converted barn which happened to be located in the same town I had been renting. In fact, it was pretty much down the street. And although the pictures weren't great, and it was hard to get a sense of the place, that voice - not the screaming one in my head but the soft, ladylike one in my gut--said "You need to go look at this house."

So I emailed my realtor-slash-friend Mary Mullane and asked her if she knew the house, and she did, and we made an appointment to see it and when we got there it turned out it was this big pink barn thing. But I didn't know it was pink because I'm colorblind. I just thought it was...I don't know...beige-y looking. And not a very attractive barn. I kind of thought we'd walk in and do the polite thing and walk around and then leave but as soon as we walked through the door, it was like that moment in fairy tales when the heroine eats a magic bean or whatever the hell they do that makes them wake up in an enchanted castle. And that voice -- the ladylike one--whispered "This is my house." And then -- no joke -- Mary leaned over and said "This is your house."

Long story short, as of this month, it is indeed my house. Well, mine and Wells Fargo Bank. Maybe at one point The Guy will join me and the cats, but at this particular moment because he has yet to make his identity known, it's just the three of us.

I love my house, but it's not for everyone. It's a quirky pink barn with 30 foot ceilings and tons of light and a pond and a see-saw and a clawfoot tub and a sauna and a washer and dryer in the bathroom and a pond full of alga. It most definitely won't be featured in a Pottery Barn catalog, even after I spend my life savings furnishing it. But my favorite part about it is that the day I went to look at it, I didn't have any expectations. Meaning I wasn't DYING to be a homeowner, and I wasn't DYING for this to be the house that ended up being mine. And when I was negotiating for it and it looked like it might not work out, I was okay with that. Because as much as I loved the place, I trusted that if it were meant to be mine, it would be..

And because I didn't have any expectations, it made that first afternoon I went back there after I had signed my life away at the closing, and used MY key to open MY front door and sat down in the middle of MY living room floor that much more special. I guess because it all felt like the product of some sort of grace versus me making it all happen.

Which is a very, very sweet feeling.

Bored?

2011-05-11T22:38:00.000-04:00

I have two ideas for you.

First, go pre-order the new Lucy B. Parker book Vote For Me! by clicking here

And after you've done that, go to Facebook and "like" me on my fan page by clicking here. That way you can be sure to keep up to date on any breaking news about my life that might occur. (as if).

Bored?

2011-05-11T22:34:00.000-04:00

I have two ideas for you.

First, go pre-order the new Lucy B. Parker book Vote For Me! by clicking here

And after you've done that, go to Facebook and "like" me on my fan page by clicking here. That way you can be sure to keep up to date on all any breaking news about my life that might occur. (as if).

TV Development 101

2011-05-05T13:05:00.000-04:00

For the last few weeks, whenever someone asks me what I've been working on, my answer is always the same: the TV pilot for Lucy B. Parker, and writing out a neverending stream of checks because I'm in the process of BUYING MY FIRST HOUSE EVER (cue applause and a marching band) and, apparently, when you're a homeowner -- or just a homeowner-to-be-- all you do is spend money.

But back to the pilot...

Although before we do that, let me just say that this is not just any house -- this is A PINK BARN that I am moving into. WITH A POND. AND A SEE-SAW. I can't tell you how much I love this place.

But back to the pilot...

(this may be WHY it's taking me so long to write the pilot...because I keep talking about the barn.)

Anyway, so in talking to people about the pilot, a lot of people ask me "So what exactly happens with that?"...and I decided since enough people seem interested, why not write a blog entry about it? Mostly because it's a little more exciting than reading about the mortgage process.

So this is how it all goes down...

When you set up a project at a network, after jumping around with joy about the fact that maybe you'll make enough money to re-do your bathroom in your new house and/or buy nice patio furniture, the first step in the process is to write a detailed outline of the scenes that will make up the script. The reason for this is because if you're the kind of person who doesn't like writing outlines (ie. me) and likes to say things like "I like to find my way into the story as I'm writing the script" (ie. me), what often happens is you end up with a 150 page script when it's supposed to be 50 because that "finding your way into the story" thing can often take a long time. (ie. me. Except I'm exaggerating about the 150 pages, obviously. It's more like 142.)

So once you're done with the outline and have gone over it 23 times to make sure you got all the typos, you send it to your producer(s) for their feedback. The moment you press "send' you immediately feel sick to your stomach and attempt to figure out how to recall it from cyber space because obviously it's the worst thing ever written...in fact, it may not even be written in english...and you can't believe you actually sent it out. After quelling your anxiety with some sort of carb, you calm down and start working on whatever got pushed aside so you could write this treatment that you didn't even want to write because you like to find your way into the story as you're writing the script.

Finally you hear back from the producer(s), with an email that usually begins "FANTASTIC job...just a few notes..." which, when you print the email out, usually ends up being three or four pages of notes. Including a list of all the typos. After you scrape yourself up from off the floor and recover from the fact that you didn't write something that was perfect the first time out of the gate, you revise the outline per their notes and send it back to them. This process can go on for a while. In my case, it went on for a very, very long while. Partly because when you're writing a pilot, you have to set up the characters and the dynamic between them and the premise of show. In like 49 pages which, when you're not the one writing it, seems relatively easy. But when you are the one writing it? Not so much.

Finally it goes to the network and you repeat the process. Except, this time, when you crumple into the fetal position on the floor after you hear their notes, it takes even longer to get up. But you do, because hopefully you have good producers who remind you that it's called the DEVELOPMENT PROCESS for a reason and who suggest you go eat something sugary and give yourself some time to take everything in before getting back to work.

Then, finally, when the network signs off on the story, you write the script. And because you've taken all this time to outline the scenes, the actual writing of the script comes really easy. Like so easy that you're sure you're doing it wrong...and then, when your first draft is almost 70 pages, you realize you ARE doing it wrong. Or rather, that's a very long first draft which means in the second draft you have to, as Dorothy Parker said, "kill your little darlings" and look at all those lines you think are brilliant and hilarious and start slashing away. Finally, after how many drafts it takes to get it to a place where the pacing is working, and the characters are clear, and there are (minimal) typos, you send it to the producers and go through the process you went through on the outline. The good news is that with each round of notes, the time on the floor and the amount of carbs consumed lessens.

Once you hand the script into the network, a few things can happen...either they love it and have minimal notes, or, in some cases, what becomes clear is that the story you've chosen isn't exactly working so you come up with a new one. (When that's the case, you're allowed a lot more carbs and time in the fetal position on the floor). At any rate, if you're lucky enough to write a script that the network loves, then they decide to shoot the pilot episode. Which means they hire a director, and cast it, and then you do even more work on the script and finally finally finally they shoot it. Then, after that, if it comes out well, and the head honchos like it, then it gets ordered to series.

So right now I'm in the script stage with Lucy. Which has been interesting because a lot of the time stuff that works in books doesn't work for TV. It's been a very educational process (read: many carbs consumed and much time spent on floor).

I will keep you posted.

Geek Charming - The Movie!

2011-03-17T19:44:00.004-04:00

Let's not talk about the fact that I haven't blogged since Christmas. That's just unacceptable. I'm hoping what makes it more acceptable is the fact that I've been busy writing--both the pilot for Yours Truly, Lucy B. Parker for Nickelodeon as well as my new YA Fairy Tale retelling based on Snow White. (Obviously I don't have a title yet.)

BUT that's not the big news. The big news is that Disney Channel started shooting Geek Charming this week and I'm really excited about the casting -- Sarah Hyland from Modern Family as Dylan, and her real life BF Matt Prokop from High School Musical 3 as Josh. I have to admit bc I've never seen any of the HSMs (I've also never seen an episode of American Idol, Survivor, or Law & Order SUV or SVU or whatever it's called, either) I didn't know who Matt was, but I LOVE Sarah Hyland so I'm very excited about that.

It will be strange to see it. I said to someone last week that it's like giving your child up for adoption and hoping that her adoptive parents don't feed her cereal for dinner every night. I'm sure it'll be great.

It's funny -this morning I was thinking about when I was writing Geek Charming. It was spring, and I was still living in L.A., and I remember all the coffee shops I'd go to. And then I finished the book in NY. I remember being in the middle of it and being so unsure about it - ie. did the alternating chapters work, etc. - et voila - soon it will be on television.

CRA-ZY.

When I've used my words up...

2010-12-27T15:09:00.005-05:00

...which, with all the books I've written over the last 5 years, would be often (I've written 8.5. And a screenplay. But who's counting.), I find that getting away from the computer and taking photos really helps me to re-fill the well.

And now that it's the week between Christmas and New Years, and now that I'm snowed in for the day, I decided to do something that I've always meant to do but have never had the time to do -- organize some of those photos on Flickr.

If you click here, you can see them.

Merry/Happy/Bonne/Feliz etc....

2010-12-24T21:22:00.004-05:00

....whatever you celebrate, and whenever you celebrate it, I hope it's a joyful, peaceful time and that the new year brings all good things.

As for me, it's Christmas Eve and I'm curled up on my couch upstate with a cat on either side listening to Patty Griffin and thinking about everything that's transpired this year, and how, yet again, although I like to think I'm psychic and know what's going to happen next or that certain things will NEVER EVER EVER change, I was wrong.

And yet...even as I write that, there are certain things that I'm sure about. Like, say, that I'll NEVER EVER EVER get this Lucy B. pilot outline right for the half-hour sitcom that Nickelodeon is developing based on the book series. Or that I won't get all my writing projects done. And a host of other things.

And yet...if what I said in the second paragraph is right, then I'm probably wrong about those things.

It's been a crazy year. Crazy bad with my mom and her brain aneurysm (she's doing great now, thank God). Crazy good with my new house upstate that I get to escape to on weekends and life I'm creating here with amazing new friends. And as I sit here, I think about how next year will bring a host of other things that I won't be able to plan for. People I will meet who I don't even know exist at the moment.

If I could give everyone reading this a holiday gift, I would take away their ability to worry. I would wish them an entire day spent in the mindset that everything is perfect as it is at the moment; that all is as it's supposed to be...

xoxo

Pretty

2010-11-07T07:50:00.004-05:00

Let's not talk about how many months it's been since I've blogged.

Instead, let's watch Katie Makkai's genius spoken word video where she talks about the word "pretty."

Wow.

Home

2010-07-29T07:37:00.004-04:00

When I was 21 years old, right after I graduated from college, I moved to Los Angeles because I had wanted to be in the movie business. I had been there a few times before, and it always seemed glamorous, and sunny, and the palm trees didn't hurt, either.

So I got there, and I didn't end up in the movie business - I ended up in the TV business and I had a nice run. But LA never felt like home. Because you have to drive everywhere, it was very isolating, and there was no real sense of community and no downtown where you could walk around and be surrounded by people. I made do, but I always wondered what it would be like to leave. Then I got out of the TV business and I started writing. And because I was writing books instead of screenplays, I realized I really didn't have to stay in LA anymore if I didn't want to. The east coast had always felt like home, and as I got older I felt myself being pulled back there more and more. So I ended up moving to New York City. And the moment I got there, I felt like a duck hitting water. It just fit. And I thought "Ohhhh...so THIS is where I'm supposed to be." The nonstop activity, the nonstop noise, the fact that within a space of a block you can hear a multitude of languages and see a cross section of people from all walks of life.

It was home in a way that nowhere else had ever been.

Then, this summer, I started itching to go on vacation. First I thought I wanted to go to the beach and I looked around for a place to rent for a week on the Cape or in Rhode Island. Nothing. Well, stuff, but you'd have to be Stephenie Meyer to afford them. Then, one night at around 11pm I stumbled across a little farmhouse for rent for the month of July up in Columbia County, NY which is about 2.5 hours from the city. And my eyes widened and I just knew that was supposed to be my house. Lucky for me, the people who were going to rent it backed out at the last minute, so when I drove up that Saturday and pulled up and saw that, yup, I was right, it was indeed my house. At least for the month of July.

Every Friday morning I'd go to Penn Station and get on the Amtrak train and in two hours I was in the country. Instead of jackhammers, I heard frogs. Instead of waiting in long lines at Whole Foods, I stopped at roadside farm stands for just-picked blueberries and peaches. Instead of being slammed up against someone on the 2 train, I was driving down traffic-less country roads with cornfields to my right and mountains to my left.

My first weekend here I said to myself "Ohhh....so THIS is where I'm supposed to be, too."

Which, for a girl who had always yearned to live in the big city was pretty funny. But there's this thing that happens as you get older where, without you even knowing how it happens, you just change. And you like the country. And when you think about what kind of car you'd want to buy if you lived in the country, all you can think of is a station wagon.

A STATION WAGON. And I don't even have kids.

Three weeks later I had found my very own little farmhouse. Up on a hill with views of the Catskills to my left and the Berkshires to the right. The first time my realtor took me there, we couldn't get in because there wasn't a key, but just peeking in the windows, I kind of knew it was mine. And then when we went back again, I definitely knew it was mine.

So I finally had a house in the country of my own. And now I needed a car to get me there.

A few weeks earlier, I had met a really sweet guy named Tom. And when I ran into him one evening, I mentioned that I needed a car and if he had any leads or suggestions, I'd appreciate it. Turns out that people call him the Car Whisperer. So Tom, because he's a really nice person, did some research for me and sent me links to things that might be of interest. Totally went above and beyond and out of his way to help me, a person who was almost a complete stranger. Even if I had never found a car, the fact that he did that meant the world to me. My dad had joked "What you need is a car that was owned by an older person that has really low miles on it." So the other day, at Tom's suggestion, I called a dealership and asked if they had anything in my price range. Turned out they had a '03 Subaru with 36,000 miles. I called Tom to tell him and even though the place was about an hour away, he offered to go with me. The fact that he was willing to give up his afternoon and schlep over across the river with me to Kingston was so nice, I could barely wrap my head around it. And because the whole buying-a-car thing freaks me out, I took him up on his offer.

The car was exactly what I wanted, and I'm picking it up today.

AND it turns out that it was owned by a woman who just turned 83.

But even more important than the car, was the fact that because it took an hour to get there each way, Tom and I got to talk a lot and I realized that my initial impression of "I'd like to be friends with this guy" was right on the money. Which is way more important than a car.

Yesterday I went to my new house and spent two hours there with my landlord as he walked me through and explained everything to me. Like the WASHER AND DRYER which is the thing I've missed more than anything since I left L.A. And as we stood in the kitchen - a real kitchen rather than a tiny kitchenette that's in the living room, which is how I live in Manhattan - I looked out into my backyard - MY BACKYARD! I HAVE A BACKYARD! - and I saw a deer. We locked eyes for a second and then he leapt off and went back into the woods. Apaprently there are a ton of them, and they like to come eat the apples and pears from my apple and pear trees (I HAVE AN APPLE AND PEAR TREE!). Plus, there are otters. Which feels so random to me that I'll have to see it for myself. And rabbits. Lots of rabbits.

This photo is the view to the right of my house. If I can't be inspired to write looking at this, I don't know what will work.

Virginia Woolf talked about the importance of having "a room of one's own".

Now I have a house of my own. With a washer and dryer. And otters. And a station wagon in the driveway.

Satire? Irony? Parody? Anyone?

2010-06-23T22:37:00.003-04:00

As someone wise once said - I don't remember who it was, but it was someone wise - if you're going to believe the good reviews, you have to believe the bad ones, too.

True.

But if you were really smart, you'd avoid reading reviews all together.

As those who read my books know, I tend to write with a significant amount of satire, making some of the characters somewhat bigger than life, as if were...Part of it is the fairy tale aspect of it...and part of it is...well, I can't explain it. It's just what I do.

When GEEK CHARMING came out, there were a lot of reviews on Amazon and Goodreads where people said they disliked Dylan and thought she was spoiled. Which meant that I did my job. Because it was a retelling of The Frog Prince - which is about a spoiled princess - you weren't SUPPOSED to like her. You were supposed to be rooting for Josh a.k.a. the frog, until Dylan began to change because of her relationship with him and she began to soften. That was her character arc.

Then my book LITTLE MISS RED came out last February. Another fairy tale retelling, it's a take-off on Little Red Riding Hod. This one, more than my first two, was a lot more steeped in parody. In the book, Sophie - the main character - is obsessed with romance. Her attitude about it all is over the top, and she's blind to who Jack a.k.a the wolf really is for a long time. Again, that's part of her arc. Because when she starts in that place, only to have the veil lifted as the book goes on and to see him for who he really is, then she has somewhere to go. For me to tell the story I wanted to tell with that one - about a girl who is so clueless about love and romance and so ingrained in the fantasy vs the reality - that's the way I had to tell it. Because to make her super grounded like Cindy Ella was wouldn't work. It's a different story. A different character. Is she silly with the way she compares everything to the plots in her books from the Devon Devereaux series? Absolutely. But does who she is as an overall character make up for that so that ultimately she's endearing and you're rooting for her? Well, that's my hope. Is Jack self-obsessed and narcissistic? Completely. But does his charm and his hotness and the way he makes Sophie feel like she's finally got some adventure in her life outweigh that? I think so. God knows I've lived that with many men in real life.

Maybe it's because I'm still relatively new at this thing. Maybe it's because I'm one of those sensitive people, but when I read reviews that make me feel like I missed the mark with my attempt, it makes me want to go find the reviewer and sit her or him down and explain what I was trying to do. Which is totally stupid. So the book wasn't their cup of tea. That's cool. Luckily there are bookstores full of books for them to choose from to find something they DO like.

Ironically, LITTLE MISS RED is my favorite of all the fairy tales. Probably because it's rather personal for me in that I got to work out my own stuff vis a vis my feelings and beliefs about love and romance.

I don't know exactly why I'm writing this. When people ask my why I write, I say it's an attempt to feel understood. And I guess, with RED in particular, I feel like people missed what I was trying to do. Not everyone, obviously, but a lot of people. Not that this is going to change their minds. But it did make me feel like I got my two cents in.

Am I the only blogger...

2010-06-21T16:15:00.003-04:00

...who finds it hard to blog?

Maybe it's because I'm not actually a blogger, but, rather, a novelist. Because the truth is I'd rather write an entire novel than one of these. I think it's cause it just feels so...personal. And yet I have no problem whatsoever alerting the Facebook world about my whereabouts in status updates.

Anyway, what can I tell you...hmmm...well, I just handed in a first revision of Lucy 3 to my editor. And now I have to do another draft of Lucy 4. And I handed in a script rewrite to ABC Family.

OH - okay. So here's the BIG news....after three years of threats, I finally got my act together and rented a house upstate. In the country. With a koi pond. And FROGS. And a WASHER AND DRYER. It's only for the month of July, and because I'm one of those people who lives in the future, I'm already sad about the fact that I'll have to give it up at the end. It's totally perfect. Like something out of a fairy tale. Which, for someone who does fairy tale retellings, makes sense. It's in Columbia County which is about 2 hours from the city.

I'm trying to think of what else I can share. As I mentioned, I've been writing a lot lately so my social life--which is tepid at best--has been on the cool side.

God, I sound boring.

The Way I Am

2010-05-27T09:40:00.005-04:00

The way I am is that, last weekend, when I was too tired to do much more than sprawl out on the couch because I was still recovering from the previous weekend's way-too-social for me agenda, I decided to pop in THE WAY WE WERE.

And yet again, after that first scene between Robert Redford and Barbara Streisand, I said to myself "God, I love this movie."

So I watched it. And I cried while I ate dried apricots. And then I got a stomach ache from the dried apricots. And then I cried a little more. Not because my stomach hurt, but because the movie is so good and I very much relate to it -- more than I'd like to, in fact.

And then after the last scene, when she says to him "Your girl is lovely, Hubbell" which is one of my favorite lines ever, I said again -- out loud this time--"God, I love this movie."

Blogging...

2010-05-27T09:25:00.002-04:00

...I have decided, is the perfect excuse for not working on my revision of Lucy 3. It's still writing, but it's not writing-writing. Or, rather, the writing that I will need to hand in soon if I'd like to get some money so I can do things like pay my rent. And buy tea from American Tea Room which is my latest obsession. (When I became a woman who prefers tea over coffee, I have no idea. I think it's an age thing.)

So Memorial Day is this weekend, which means that summer is here. I'm so glad it's finally warm...as much as I try not to complain about NY winters because all my friends in L.A., when I told them I was moving to NY, said "Oh, you're going to hate the winters" and I'm too stubborn to admit that they were right, the fact is I do kind of hate them. Mostly I hate the greyness of them. The fact that everyone walks around with their heads down. I'm much more of a sundress kinda girl. Which my recent $200 dry cleaning bill after I took them out of storage can attest to.

I desperately need a vacation, but can't quite decide where to go. I'm thinking maybe the Cape. Or Maine. Somewhere where I can listen to the ocean and eat fried clam rolls.

Another great review of LUCY...

2010-05-26T07:40:00.000-04:00

from BOOKLIST...

Yours Truly, Lucy B. Parker: Girl vs. Superstar.
Palmer, Robin (Author)
May 2010. 224 p. Penguin/Puffin, hardcover, $15.99. (9780399254895). Penguin/Puffin, paperback,
$6.99. (9780142415009).
Sixth-grader Lucy has been dumped by her two BFFs, is on the alert for the start of her period, and is
basically trying to get through each day without humiliating herself. The last thing she needs is to be
known as the gawky, untalented stepsister of TV star Laurel Moses, the most adored teen celebrity in the
world. But that’s exactly what will happen when Lucy’s mom marries Laurel’s dad. Blending Lucy’s emails
to TV agony aunt Dr. Maude with Lucy’s first-person narrative about how her life becomes
increasingly entangled with Laurel’s, this funny, fast-paced book introduces what should be a promising
new series. Lucy presents herself as just a normal girl trying to survive an extraordinary turn of events, but
readers will recognize that there is nothing average about Lucy, and what she lacks in star quality is easily
compensated for by her honesty, humor, and moxie. Give this to fans of Meg Cabot’s work, who will
enjoy watching Lucy transition from small-town living to life in the limelight.
— Kara Dean

And now..an important public service announcement.

2010-05-23T22:22:00.002-04:00

Love this

Yay, Lucy!

2010-05-18T13:56:00.002-04:00

What an awesome review of YTLBP!

Click here to read...

Sadly, it's come to this...

2010-04-23T10:28:00.002-04:00

...I had to spend $10 to download this program called Freedom so that I would stop Googling completely random things while I was writing. Or check my Facebook page. Or my Amazon ranking.

But the thing is, my iPhone still has internet capability.

Do you know how frustrating it is to be using your Safari browser on your iPhone to Google when you're sitting in front of your laptop but you can't use that because you don't know how to TURN OFF the Freedom program that you've set to keep you off the Internet for 2 hours?

Very.

Lucy B. is here...

2010-04-22T06:51:00.003-04:00

So the first book in my new series YOURS TRULY, LUCY B. PARKER is now in stores (and of course I had to go and CHECK because I never believe that it's actually going to happen)...so you can go to the store and get it, using it as an excuse to buy a bunch of other books; and maybe some magazines; and maybe a new Moleskine notebook (which is what I do at the bookstore...) or you can click here

There was a really nice mention on one of the CafeMom blogs about it here where they refer to it as "it's Are You There God, It's Me Margaret pushed to the new millennium with a dose of angst taken out"....which, as far as I'm concerned, is the best compliment ever seeing that the book is actually dedicated to Judy Blume.

Will be in L.A. this weekend for the L.A. Time Festival of Books, appearing on a panel at 1p on Sunday on the YA Stage and signing after. Good news is that you don't need to get tickets beforehand, but you should get there early so you get a good seat.

Yay Lucy B. Yay LA Times Festival of Books. Yay the fact that it's finally spring.

Lucy B. Parker website is up & running...

2010-04-08T22:43:00.002-04:00

....and I think it turned out SUPER cute.

Click here to see it.

Lucy B. review!

2010-04-08T07:05:00.002-04:00

So the first book in my YOURS TRULY, LUCY B. PARKER series comes out on April 20th, and some reviews are starting to trickle in....I particularly appreciate this one by Stacy Dillon.

Come see me!

2010-04-07T20:21:00.004-04:00

I'm excited to announce that I'll be on a panel at the 2010 LA Times Festival of Books, held at UCLA. The panel is called Girls Just Wanna Have Fun: Writing Today's Teens and it will take place on Sunday, April 25th at 1pm on the YA Stage. I'll be appearing with Lisi Harrison and Amy Goldman Koss, and it will be moderated by Aaron Hartzler Here's a link to all the pertinent info (ie schedule, free ticket info, etc.) And afterwards I'll be signing.

So I just have to say one thing because it's pretty cool. As some of you know, I lived in L.A. for a million years (okay, maybe just 17 but on the bad days it FELT like a million). And for years, when I'd go to the Book Festival, there was this teeny tiny voice inside of me - so faint that I could barely hear it, because what it was saying seemed absolutely absurd - but the voice would say "One day I'll come here as an author. And one day I'll be on one of those panels."

Like I said, I thought the idea of that was insane -- I mean who did I think I WAS to dare to allow myself to think like that?! Well, on the BAD days, I did the "Who-do-you-think-you-are" thing. On the good days, I did the "Maybe there's the slightest chance that there could be the tiniest sliver of a possibility that that could actually come to pass."

Very glass-half-empty of me, I know.

Yeah, well, so guess what? It IS coming to pass.

Just keep that in mind when you try and talk yourself out of thinking your dreams can come true, okay?

Lucy B. Parker is Tweeting....

2010-04-06T07:30:00.002-04:00

....Click here to follow her.

Let's see if she's any better than I am at this Twitter business.

How to Avoid Writing

2010-04-04T16:24:00.007-04:00

I think at last count I had about 7,242 ways to accomplish this, but today the number went up to 7,243.

Ready?

Hipstamatic.

It's this incredibly cool app you can download for your iPhone that makes it so you can take lomo-like photos. (lomo=short for lomography which you can read about here

So fun. So easy. So much of a time waster!

Oh, and BTW? That black blob in the top right hand corner in the photo of my feet? That's a cat.

I'm alive....

2010-04-02T23:02:00.005-04:00

...Let me rephrase that--I'm coming back to life, like the trees that are finally blooming up and down the streets of Manhattan, after a very long winter, and a pretty horrible March.

The Cliffs notes version is my mom had a brain aneurysm and a brain bleed. Out of nowhere. And she's very, very lucky to be alive. It's weird writing this blog, because when I do (which as we all know isn't all that often...) I have to remember that a lot of the people who come to this site are my readers, so they're younger. But then there's also other authors, or my friends, or my dad, or other people for whom high school was a long, long time ago. So keeping all that in mind, I feel like I have to be mindful of what I say. You know, nothing inappropriate. (Not like I walk around saying inappropriate things.) (Okay, maybe I do occasionally.)

But when I was thinking about what I wanted to say about this experience, it was this...

I think part of being a mother, and part of being a daughter -- part of being a human being, really -- is that people are occasionally, or maybe even regularly, going to drive you crazy. And you'll fight with them, and complain about the fact that they don't understand you, but the whole time that's happening, in the back of your mind you're always thinking "But it's not like I really have to deal with that now and accept that they're human beings and remember that at the end of the day, we're all just doing the best we can, so why not just cut someone a break...I mean, why should I do that now when I have, oh, I don't know, the next 30 years or so to do that?"

And then someone has a brain aneurysm and almost dies and you realize that, um, maybe you DON'T have 30 years to do that. In fact, maybe you should think about doing that, you know, NOW.

So a few weeks ago I went to Arizona, where my parents live, to see my mom in the hospital. And the first day I was there, she was pretty out of it, but I got to hold her hand, like in the picture, and it was still soft and it was still warm, and amazingly enough, her nails still looked good which I'm sure she would have been really glad to know because she's always had impeccably manicured hands. And then the second afternoon when I got there, she was a little more coherent, and she recognized me which made me happy and relieved. And then when my dad and I went back there that night, she was even more coherent and this time when she saw me, she smiled and the nurse came in and said "Look, she's smiling!" which made me really happy. And even though my dad had told me that while her short-term memory was a problem at the moment because of the aneurysm, her long-term memory was still perfectly in tact. However, I of course had to find this out for myself, lest I leave the next morning for L.A. still worrying, which is pretty much all I had been doing since this aneurysm business started. So I started saying "Hey Mom, remember when we did this when I was little.." and "Remember when we did that..." and interestingly all the memories I had at that moment just happened to be all this really GREAT stuff that happened when I was young. Stuff that, frankly, I hadn't thought about in years. Like how when I was in the hospital for 2 weeks for my back when I was 13, she'd come and spend all day with me.

And as I was talking to her, she looked at me and she said "I was a really good mother" and I squeezed her hand and I said "Yes. You certainly were. And you still ARE."

'Cause she was. And she is.

So the moral of the story is, please remember that as much as you'd like to think you have 30 years to get it all together (or, if you're one of my readers, 80 years), the truth is, sadly, that's not always the case. And if your mom is still around, think about going up to her, or calling her on the phone and saying "Hey Mom--you know what? You're a really good mom." Even if, at that moment, she's driving you crazy or you might not think she understands you. Not only will it make her feel good, but I have a feeling it'll make YOU feel even better.

'Cause here's the thing--your mom? Chances are she's doing the best she can. Just like you're doing the best you can. And I bet she loves you very, very much. And when we can remember that, it seems to make this dealing-with-human-beings thing A LOT easier.

My co-writer

2010-03-01T09:12:00.003-05:00

This is Onyx, who, while I'm writing, either (a) sits on my lap or (b) paws at me because she's begging for food because next to throwing up hairballs, her favorite pastime is eating.

I took the photo, but then Carlo (you can click on his website from the link over on the right) used Photoshop to make it look all beautiful and dream-like, which I love. Because when I look at this photo, I can almost forgive her for the numerous trips to the drycleaner I have to make because her favorite place to deposit the aforementioned hairballs is on my duvet cover.

Fun news

2010-02-25T21:47:00.002-05:00

I feel like one of those pregnant women who waits until she's three months along before officially announcing it..except in my case I'm having two more book babies....

I'm super excited to announce that not only will I be doing another fairy tale retelling as part of the Castle Heights "companionship" -- this one based on Snow White -- but also that I'll be writing one called ALICE À PARIS, loosely based on Alice In Wonderland, about an American girl abroad in Paris.

And you know what that means, don't you?

That I'll obviously have to go live in Paris for a while and do research....

Back when I was young...

2010-02-25T08:33:00.005-05:00

(God, I sound so old. Like I'm 80 with Brillo hair and elastic waist slacks.)

Anyway, back when I was young, we didn't have YouTube. We didn't even have computers.

But I think it's so cool that this fantastic girl named Jenna did these video reviews of Cindy Ella and Geek Charming. So creative. And she's going to do one for Little Miss Red this weekend :)

I have to say, I don't know what other authors' readers are like, but as far as I'm concerned, mine are the coolest. Seriously. They're so unique, with such a sense of self-possession...I'm truly in awe of them.

I am an emotional creature...

2010-02-23T23:03:00.004-05:00

And I love, hear me,
love love love
being a girl.

The words above are from one of Eve Ensler's monologues from her new book I AM AN EMOTIONAL CREATURE. You can read the entire thing here and I strongly urge you to do so because it's incredibly powerful. Also, her talk on TED about what she calls "the girl cell" - which you can watch by clicking here is fantastic.

It rained all day today. And it's cold. The kind of weather that makes you want to hang out in a hot bubble bath rather than schlep all the way uptown to 92nd Street - EAST 92nd Street, to be exact - not even WEST - to go hear Eve Ensler give a lecture at the 92nd Street Y, but because I had already bought my ticket, schlep I did.

And I'm so glad I did.

I was so moved, so inspired, so...desirous of getting involved in her new V-Girls organization which you can read about here

It made me really, really glad that I'm a girl.

Take the quiz...

2010-02-19T19:05:00.002-05:00

Here's a fun quiz that Penguin put together.

Take it and then comment and let me know which character you are. :)

Oh right.

2010-02-19T07:38:00.003-05:00

I have a blog. Where I'm supposed to be writing things about....I don't know...things.

I just handed in the third book in the series YOURS TRULY, LUCY B. PARKER - which feels so weird seeing that the first one isn't even out yet (it will be, on April 20th) - so I'm giving myself four whole days to not write, which feels like an eternity. Unfortunately that time will be spent doing my taxes which is right after "stick needles in my eyes" on my list of Top 10 Ways to Spend My Time.

I figured out I wrote three books this last year. And a rewrite of a screenplay. So I"m a little tired. But beyond grateful to have the work. I received an email from a 14 year old girl in Cyprus a few weeks ago who said that my books made her feel "more normal" which, as far as I'm concerned, is the biggest compliment I could ever receive and better than any award. When I was fourteen, reading did the same thing for me - made me feel more normal. And at 41, it still does that for me, although the older I get, the more I realize that the whole idea of "normal" is kind of a crock. And that, frankly, normal people are boring. But on my not-so-good days, I yearn to be normal because somehow I think that that'll make life easier. Which it doesn't. Life is life and there are good days, and bad days, and boring days, and exciting days and the only thing you can count on is that it's always changing...maybe not as quickly as you'd like, but it DOES change. Usually once you stop trying to make it change and just relax into what's going on in the moment.

(Wow. I'm really rambling. And I'm only halfway into my first cup of coffee.)

So LITTLE MISS RED is out...haven't gotten a ton of feedback on it yet, but what's interesting is that some of the comments are along the lines of the fact that Jack - the hot guy that Sophie falls for - is sort of a jerk. Which, because this is a retelling of Little Red Riding Hood and he's the wolf character - he's supposed to be. And Sophie's journey is to come to realize that. I don't know how it is for other authors, but for me, the reason I write is to feel understood...and maybe it's just because I haven't been doing this that long, but every time I read a review where I feel as if the reader hasn't quite understood my intention of what I was attempting to do, I want to go over to their house and and bang on their door and sit them down at their kitchen table and explain myself so that I can change their mind and they'll not only get it, but they'll love it.

(Did I just admit that? On a blog? A blog that is public and can be read by everyone?)

But that's not going to happen (a) because it's insane and (b) because I have too many writing deadlines to hit so I don't have the time to traipse around the country ;)

Oh - before I forget. If you live in NYC, as part of the NYC Teen Author Festival, I will be taking part of a panel discussion on Friday 3/19 from 4:15-5 in the South Court of the 42nd Street NYPL (the one with the lions) called The Boy You Can't Have.

Happy Pub Day, Little Miss Red!

2010-02-09T08:10:00.005-05:00

Finally - she's here! You can buy your copy on Amazon by clicking here or from Barnes & Noble by clicking here

It's a modern retelling of Little Red Riding Hood, about a girl who is obsessed with romance and bowled over by a very hot, charming, wolfish guy only to find out he's not all that.

Not that I, um, have any experience with that kind of thing...

My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

2010-01-26T18:05:00.003-05:00

So the cover story of this week's New York magazine is about dogs and how we treat them as family members, and are they even dogs anymore. And it got me thinking about a conversation I had with my father on my birthday last week.

After he wished me a happy birthday he said "I want you to see if you can list every dog we had from the time you were born." I waited for him to tell me what my prize would be if I could do it, but he didn't offer anything up but because I'm always up for a challenge I took the bait. When I was done--listing some that he had completely forgotten about -- the grand total came to 21.

21 dogs in 41 years.

And I wonder why I have problems with commitment.

Hmm...

2010-01-26T16:35:00.005-05:00

I've been having blog envy recently.

To be more specific, I was just perusing Neil Gaiman's blog because I kind-of-sort-of have a crush on him (I was also kind-of-sort-of devastated to hear that he and Amanda Palmer got engaged a few weeks ago...who, BTW, is also from Boston, with the same last name as me). Anyway, if you click on the link, you'll see what I mean. Because he's got stuff to say. Granted, at the moment, it's really sad stuff--like how he had to put his cat to sleep--but I envy the way that he talks about himself and his personal life in such a way that it never feels narcissistic or self-indulgent. Then again, maybe it is, and the crush thing just makes it seem all so adorable to me.

Here's my issue: I don't WANT to have every blog entry I do be in the vein of "Hey, go onto Amazon and pre-order Little Miss Red and/or Yours Truly, Lucy B. Parker or - better yet - both!" but when I think about writing about my personal life and stuff that isn't related to my books, I just feel like "Who the hell wants to read about THAT?"

A few years ago there was a story in the New York Times magazine written by Emily Gould about the perils of oversharing. And I remember reading it and thinking "that girl just completely overshared about oversharing..." And I don't ever want to be that kind of girl, you know? But on the other hand, there's probably a happy medium...like I can write about stuff that has to do with me and my life without feeling too exposed.

Then again, if I had Neil Gaiman's life, I'd probably have a lot more to say...

More later.

My 15 minutes of fame...

2010-01-15T16:54:00.003-05:00

..at least in YouTube land.

As promised, here are the videos I shot in Central Park last week.

You can watch the one about LITTLE MISS RED here and the one about YOURS TRULY, LUCY B. PARKER here.

Let's all be thankful that I spend most of my time in solitary confinement writing rather than in front of a camera. Yikes.

Once upon a time...

2010-01-09T19:12:00.003-05:00

...there was an author who wrote modern-day retellings of fairy tales. (That would be me). And one day, the fabulously creative Courtney Wood --the senior online marketing manager for Penguin Young Readers, who publishes the aforementioned fairy tale retelling author -- came up with the brilliant idea that instead of sitting in a boring office to do an author profile video, they should do it in a horse-drawn carriage ride through Central Park because that's a very fairy tale-like thing to do. The fairy tale author loved the idea, especially since she had recently procured a black fur headband over the holidays which made her look very Russian princess-like and would be the perfect accessory to wear during the shoot. So one Thursday morning, on a very beautiful, freeze-your-butt-off January morning, the two -- along with the uber talented filmmaker Lauren Saffa -- went for a carriage ride around the park with a horse named Blackie (a lot of originality in that name) leading the way. Actually, they went around the park TWICE because the author tends to be a bit longwinded at times so they needed more coverage.

The video should be ready very shortly and of course I'll post a link here even though, to be honest, while I have no problem whatsoever talking in front of groups, whenever I see myself on film I want to book a one-way ticket to a deserted island and never return. Let's just say it's a good thing I chose the writing vs. acting path.

Have you ordered your copy of Little Miss Red yet?

2010-01-08T08:12:00.002-05:00

...because it comes out ONE MONTH FROM TOMORROW.

So you can click here to order it.

I did my first reading from it on Wednesday and people seemed to really like it.

Ciao...mi chiamo Robin e scrivo romanzi....

2010-01-04T10:16:00.002-05:00

"My name is Robin and I write novels."

That's about the only thing I've perfected so far as I try and learn Italian. I've said it so many times aloud that I swear Onyx, one of my cats, has taken to rolling her eyes.

So I studied French from grade 7 all the way through college. 10 years. And you'd think that after all that time and effort, I would have tried to keep it up. But I didn't. Which is why 20 years later, I can't say I'm fluent in French, and yet it keeps getting in the way of me learning Italian.

And that's why I've decided that I will start a new language...Fritalian. Where we will say things like "Bonjour! Come stai?" (Hi--in French--How are you? -- in Italian).

That being said, Italian is a really beautiful language and there are enough similarities to French that at some point something will click and it'll get easier (at least that's what I tell myself.)

I'm not a big resolution-maker, but learning Italian is definitely on the list of Things-I-want-to-do-in-2010-but-I'm-not-going-to-call-them-resolutions-in-case-I-fail-miserably.

And cooking. Definitely more cooking.

And buying an apartment (which translates to please-buy-lots-and-lots-of-my-books-so-I-can-afford-to-do-that).

AND BLOGGING ON A REGULAR BASIS. That's #1 on the non-resolution list.

Happy happy new year, anyone who is reading this--even the people who post anonymous comments that are obviously computer-generated.

xx

Little Miss Red reading in NYPL on January 6th

2009-12-30T21:15:00.002-05:00

If you live in NYC and you have nothing better to do with your evening (I'm so good at selling myself, aren't i?), I'll be reading from LITTLE MISS RED at the Jefferson Market Branch of NYPL (425 6th Ave, at 10th St) on January 6th along with three other YA authors. Starts at 6pm. The book doesn't come out until February so it's a sneak peek.

I know you're not supposed to choose favorites amongst your children but I have to say, I think this is my favorite out of all the fairy tale retellings I've written so far.

Tweet this

2009-12-22T08:02:00.004-05:00

So I told my publishers I would start twittering more.

But here's the thing, for some reason I have absolutely no problem coming up with Facebook status updates (by the way, please friend me on there if you already haven't)...but when it comes to Twitter I just freeze up. And any and all of my wittiness is nowhere to be found. It's weird.

That being said, I will continue to try...and an audience always helps...so you can find me at robinpalmer on twitter to follow me.

xx

Smart Girls at the Party

2009-12-21T15:32:00.003-05:00

How cool is 7 3/4-year-old Ruby in this video

This makes me laugh so hard.

2009-12-21T14:14:00.001-05:00

Funny, right?

Very intrigued by this white stuff.

2009-12-20T08:42:00.001-05:00

I'm sorry, but I was hoping full-fledged, Blizzard-of-'78 type circumstances. No such luck.

First snow of the winter! First time I've blogged in over a month!

2009-12-19T20:03:00.002-05:00

It's like every day that goes by, I feel worse and worse about the fact that I haven't blogged, so I just...don't. And instead walk around feeling guilty.

I don't know...the blogging thing is hard for me. 'Cause I think "who really cares what I have to say?" When I write my books, and it's a character, then it's a different story - because they're not me, so I find them just as interesting as readers do. But when it's me, it's hard. Except with Facebook status updates. Those I like doing. But not Twitter. That I don't like doing.

So let's see...what can I tell you. LITTLE MISS RED comes out on February 9th which I'm super excited about. I think that Sophie, the lead character, is the closest to me out of all of the books I've written. For good for for bad ;) And I just finished the manuscript for YOURS TRULY, LUCY B. PARKER #2 which is a relief. The first one comes out in May. And on Monday I'm going on a horse-drawn carriage ride in Central Park (on a white horse - how fairy tale-like is THAT?!) to shoot a video for Penguin. That will be interesting.

Oh, and I've been making a lot of stews. When did that happen? When did I turn into the kind of woman who makes stews? That's crazy.

I hope everyone is having very happy holidays.

Crazy small world story...

2009-11-09T19:54:00.005-05:00

Okay, so this is a crazy story.

So five or so years ago I wrote a screenplay with my good friend Julie-then-Golden-now-Dubensky. And to celebrate the fact that we had finished it and it was now out to producers where it would then sell for millions of dollars in a bidding war, we went to Barneys to buy some makeup. What we really wanted were shoes, but we behaved ourselves.

So we're being helped by this very nice guy named Ozzie at the Nars counter and this girl walks by who Julie knows, who, I find out after the fact, also used to be an exec, and who, like us, is now also a screenwriter. And she tells us how she and her writing partner just handed in a rewrite and as I listen, I try not to feel too inferior about the fact that this girl is apparently a working-writer-who-gets-checks-sent-to-her-occasionally while I am still a working-but-not-getting-any-checks writer.

Fast forward: the spec script that was going to make us millions of dollars doesn't sell, I start writing books, move to NY, blah blah blah. One of those books - GEEK CHARMING - gets set up at Disney Channel and these two screenwriters, Hilary Galanoy and Elizabeth Hackett are hired to adapt it. Around the same time, the spec script that's been gathering dust for a few years in my computer (okay, fine, it's probably not gathering dust...it's...dying of lack of light) gets set up as a movie at ABC Family, which means that in addition to my books I have to write, in addition to my MTV exec duties, I now have to rewrite the script with Julie. And hopefully finish it in 22 days before she goes in for her scheduled C-section and comes home with a baby boy. But I'm not complaining about all the work I have to do because I am well aware that these are very high class problems and people would chew off their left arm to have my life even though if they did that, it would make it very hard for them to type and get the work done.

So tonight, I'm working on the rewrite, and I get an email from my friend Robyn who tells me that in small world fashion, her friend Elizabeth is adapting my book. And later I'm on the phone with Julie and I bring that up and Julie reminds me that the girl we ran into at Barneys that day? It was Hilary.

So it turns out that I met the woman who would be adapting my novel years before it was even written. And while they're adapting my book, I'm working on a rewrite of a script that I was pretty concerned would never see the light of day.

What I Did This Weekend by Robin Palmer

2009-11-02T07:08:00.006-05:00

1. Spend a good chunk of Saturday in my pajamas waiting for fedex to deliver my bakers rack because I don't have a doorman and therefore have to do everything.

2. Bake fig bars, compliments of my new idol The Pioneer Woman's apricot bar recipe.

3. Fantasize that one day I might become PIoneer Woman-like and be (a) that funny and (b) that good of a cook.

4. Assemble bakers rack upon its arrival. Break a few nails in process. Try not to wallow in disappointment when it turns out to not be as grand as the picture on Amazon.com.

5. Spend time thinking about taking photo of assembled bakers rack to post here because I'm so proud of myself before deciding that borders on pathetic.

5. Invite my friend Laurina over for the orange chicken with figs and golden raisins I am intending to make that night, because, now that I am a Cook, I can (a) cook such grand-sounding meals and (b) have people over for dinner.

6. Receive text back that she'd love to come for dinner...but she's a vegetarian.

7. Spend a few moments annoyed that people can't put their vegetarian ways aside every once in a while, especially for such a grand-sounding meal that I'm about to slave away over.

8. Resort to my previous non-Cook ways and text her back that we can just order in takeout instead.

9. Have a yoga-induced inspiration that I can make lentil soup and a salad instead because part of being a Cook is learning how to improvise on the fly and not resort to takeout or microwaveable Weight Watchers box dinner.

10. Prepare lentil soup and salad which, according to Laurina, is "very good" but what the hell else is she going to say when she's sitting on my couch and I've just fed her. However, the fig bars are "awesome" and I know she's not lying about that because I've already tested them by eating three.

11. Decide I really don't like the Cleaning Up part of being a Cook but I do it anyway.

12. Post Sunday evening yoga, finally cook the orange chicken with figs and golden raisins even though (a) it won't be ready until 9pm and (b) realize as I'm cooking it that I could feed a small country which is why my coworkers at MTV will be thanking me the next day.

13. Wonder how I'm going to prevent myself from gaining 20 pounds now that I'm a Cook.

14. Speak to my father, who asks what sort of white light, spiritual experience I had that has turned me into a Cook. I have no answer.

15. Go to sleep full and happy...with a prayer that I sell a ton of books so that I can afford a new apartment with a real kitchen instead of the Betty Crocker-sized one that I have now.

To Write Love On Her Arms Day

2009-10-31T21:47:00.003-04:00

To Write Love on Her Arms is a non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery.

So on November 13th, they are asking that you write the word "LOVE" on your arm. That's all. You don't have to buy anything, or donate any money. Just write it - to show some compassion for those who are suffering. But preferably not with a Sharpie 'cause you might want to be able to wash it off at some point.

To Write Love On Her Arms Day is a day where anyone can write the words love on their arms, to support those who are fighting against depression and those who are trying to recover.

For more information, click here to go to the website. Or click here to find it on Facebook. Actually, do that - because I'm sort of crashing from the combination of brown sugar and real butter in the fig bars I baked today and therefore couldn't concentrate on the directions.

I heart Philip Roth

2009-10-30T08:22:00.004-04:00

It's 8.22am and I"m supposed to be writing, but instead I was just watching this interview with Philip Roth here.

I love that every time he finishes a book, he, too, panics that he's never going to come up with another idea. If Philip Roth is worried about that, then I don't feel so bad...

And now I'm going back to writing. For real.

Happy accidents..

2009-10-29T20:30:00.006-04:00

There are always two people in every picture: the photographer and the viewer. ~Ansel Adams

My favorite thing in life is being surprised. Like when something -- or someone -- shows up that you weren't expecting. Because for me, there's something about that element of surprise that makes me even more grateful for it. And more humbled by it, because I had absolutely nothing to do with its arrival -- I didn't plan for it; I didn't will it. It just...happened.

I won't go into the whole story, but Carlo was -- is--a beautiful, sweet surprise in my life. He's also an amazing photographer.

If you click here you can see for yourself.

Molto bella, no?

And this one here, of the bed...this is one of his. I just love it.

Things are getting wacky at Casa del Palmer...

2009-10-26T21:13:00.003-04:00

...because I just ordered a bakers rack. So I can continue this cooking thing I've been doing.

Crazy.

I know - this probably wins World's Most Boring Blog Post, but it's all I got at the moment...

Before you know it I may even turn the Food Network (is it called Food Network or Food Channel? I don't even know) on...

If you're bored...

2009-10-21T07:16:00.002-04:00

...why not PRE-ORDER my newest book Little Miss Red by clicking here.

It doesn't come out until February, but that way you'll be all set and will be sure that you'll have a copy in case, you know, there's a giant stampede and they all go out of print.

Announcing the arrival of LUCY B. PARKER....

2009-10-16T12:39:00.003-04:00

Okay, not the arrival-arrival, because that's not until next May, but I am pleased to share the cover of my latest book. The illustrator is the amazing Anne Cresci If you click on her name, it will take you to her Etsy store...ironically, she has an illustration of Little Red Riding Hood, which, of course, I promptly purchased because of LITTLE MISS RED.

I feel so thrilled that Penguin's design goddess Kristin Smith, who has done the covers for all of my books, found Anne because she completely gets Lucy.

Now if I could just get her to design MY wardrobe...

Obviously I was given a lobotomy while I was sleeping...

2009-10-15T08:11:00.003-04:00

....or there's some body switching going on. Because last night, on my way home from work, I stopped at Bed Bath & Beyond and bought a crock-pot. Which is a device that is apparently used to make things like stews and stuff from scratch. Without the help of a microwave.

I barely recognize myself anymore.

Soup update....

2009-10-12T08:24:00.002-04:00

It turned out fantastic. Other than the fact that I forgot to put in the garlic.

So fantastic, in fact, that I also ended up making this eggplant/onion/pepper/honey/chili pepper thingy. I'm not sure exactly what it is -- a soup? A stew? But it was delicious.

Next up: turkey chili. I smell a new obsession here. As long as I stay away from baking, I'm okay.

Big day today....

2009-10-11T10:00:00.004-04:00

...I am going to attempt to cook. Accent on the attempt part. Because those who know me, know this sort of thing happens once every 50 years. And I'm only 40.

Just to give you some context, I have never watched any of those cooking channels on The Food Channel or that Top Chef show that people talk about all the time. I don't even know if The Food Channel is part of my cable package. I never saw the movie Julie & Julia and have no interest, even though I love Meryl Streep. And when they announced that Gourmet magazine was about to become extinct and all my friends started freaking out, I was relieved because the girl who used to live here apparently had a subscription and it keeps coming here which means I recycle it without even cracking it open. But I secretly wish I had some interest in that stuff. Just like I secretly wish that I was one of those people who loved The Container Store because I really had an interest in making the best use of the minimal amount of space that constitutes a NYC apartment. But I just don't (a) because I have become quite fond of the prepared food sections of Whole Foods and Lifetyme Natural Market (b) I like to think that disorganization is the hallmark of a very creative mind.

But what spurred on this whole cooking thing was that yesterday I spent the day writing with my friend Ophira Edut, who is one half of The AstroTwins , (her twin sister Tali--who just got married at Burning Man -- congrats, Tali--is the other half). Ophira is amazingly cool on a lot of different levels...not the least of which is that if you tell her the astrological sign of a guy you're interested in, she can tell you EXACTLY what he's like....and you can read all about that in their book The AstroTwins' Love Zodiac But even better than that is the fact that Ophira cooks. Not only that, but apparently, she enjoys cooking which is about as foreign an idea to me as the notion that one day I'll (a) perfect my French accent to the point where the waiters at Cafe de Flore don't grimace when I ask for my cafe creme or (b) I'll organize my apartment and find a place for my shoes other than the middle of my bedroom floor. So yesterday, as I sat there plugging away on Lucy #3, Ophria made lentil soup. And it was so good -- and so perfect for what was trying to be a beautiful autumn day but falling short because it was still on the warm side -- that I became very inspired. Inspired to the point where I asked her for the recipe, which, much to my surprise and dismay, was so easy that a 5 year old could make it as long as he or she had proper supervision during the chopping part.

I say dismay, because even though I have what I believe is the tiniest kitchen on the island of Manhattan (see above picture for evidence) the recipe is so easy with so few steps that I can make it here.

So because it's technically autumn, and because I'm still sick with with what I'm sure is some new strain of flu -- like, say, monkey flu -- and because I need to stop using that PMS excuse and stop eating sugar and start eating vegetables and protein again, I. Am. Going. To. Cook. Soup. (Is that even proper grammar -- does one "cook soup" or "make soup"?

Not only that, but I'm going to also make some sort of eggplant thingy while I'm at it. Or at least buy the ingredients for it which will probably then spoil in the fridge because I'll lose steam and interest during this marathon cooking session and walk to Whole Foods and get my usual quinoa/beet/tofu salad combination like I do every day.

I will, of course, blog about this all later.

Why is it so hard for me to blog on a regular basis?

2009-10-10T14:34:00.004-04:00

Not that anyone is sitting there with bated breath waiting for me to wax on and on self-obsessedly (Did I just make that word up? I think I did.) but, still, I feel bad that it's been almost two months since I've written here.

That being said, I have a lot of very good excuses as to why I haven't. Like, say, my trip to Paris that I had to get ready for. And then the trip to Paris that I took. And then the glorious week after Paris that I spent improving relations between America and Italy. And then getting back into the day-to-day boring reality of real life after L'Italien went back to Italy. And then getting super sick with what I was pretty sure was swine flu even though people kept rolling their eyes and saying "It's NOT swine flu" every time I said "I think I have swine flu." And then working on the MTV movie Turn The Beat Around which everyone has to watch when it airs in January so it gets good ratings and I will continue to have a day job.

Oh yeah - and writing. That's a very good excuse as to why I haven't been blogging - because I've been writing books. Specifically, I'm on Book 3 of the YOURS TRULY, LUCY B. PARKER series which I'm totally loving. I just saw the artwork for the cover of the first one and I LOVE it. Really, really fabulous.

So that's why I haven't been blogging. Because I've been living. Who knew that could be so much fun?

I wish I could post my pics from Paris here, but honestly I'm too lazy to upload all of them and too technically-challenged to create one of those photo albums that anyone in the world can see. However, if you're my friend on Facebook, you can see them there. And if you're not my friend on Facebook, please become one 'cause a girl can never have too many friends.

In the meantime, here are a few of my favorites.....

And I'm going to blog more...I promise...

xox

Oh, how true...

2009-08-29T10:01:00.003-04:00

I know - two posts in, like, 10 minutes. A miracle.

Just realized today marks two years since I've lived in NYC.

I have always loved this EB White quote:

There are roughly three New Yorks. There is, first, the New York of the man or woman who was born here, who takes the city for granted and accepts its size and its turbulence as natural and inevitable. Second, there is the New York of the commuter — the city that is devoured by locusts each day and spat out each night. Third, there is the New York of the person who was born somewhere else and came to New York in quest of something.

I am the third. But I learned a while back that it's rather fruitless to try and figure out what you're looking for, so for what I'm questing, I have no idea...

For some reason tweeting makes me feel like a twit...

2009-08-29T09:43:00.002-04:00

but I'm trying it again.

Click here to follow me.

GEEK has made it to the Top 10 of YALSA's 2009 Teens' Top 10 List!

2009-08-27T09:23:00.003-04:00

I have been such a bad blogger...I'm sorry...and I hate that my newest post is to ask you to do something..

BUT if you're so inclined, I am thrilled to announce that GEEK CHARMING has made it to YALSA's 2009 Teens' Top 10 list and if you're a teen and would like to vote for it, click here

I so appreciate the support.

xox

One of my favorite poems....

2009-07-22T18:48:00.003-04:00

is this one by Stephen Dunn.

We love Disney Channel...

2009-07-14T06:29:00.003-04:00

...for optioning GEEK CHARMING as a movie!

So what that means is that they will now hire a screenwriter to write a screenplay based on the book...and if the stars align just right, then they'll make the movie....but who knows if that'll ever happen. I'm just thrilled that it's gotten this far. The producers are Mandeville Films, the same people behind The Proposal which I just saw the other nite and thought was very cute. How can you not love Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds?

Okay, back to work...

"One is not born a woman, one becomes one"...with the help of this very cool t-shirt.

2009-06-25T07:52:00.005-04:00

So there is this woman named Paige Orloff, who I have never met, but, who like me, used to live in L.A. and did the whole film/TV exec thing before she packed it all in and moved east. But in her case, not to a teenytiny apartment in downtown Manhattan but to a farmhouse in upstate New York. With, like, chickens.

Anyway, I had heard her name over the years and, according to Facebook, we had all these mutual friends, and I stumbled upon this fantastic blog she does with a group of other women called The Sister Project,. The other day she had a post about this very cool woman named Lindsay Keating who has a shop on Etsy called KM Stitchery where she sells these amazing t-shirts and dresses with hand-stenciled visages of feminist icons like Simone de Beauvoir (whose quote "One is not born a woman, one becomes one" was one of the millions posted on the bulletin board that I used to have hanging over my desk in L.A.) and Frida Kahlo

Both of which I am ordering.

So check out Paige's blog and Lindsay's shop.

(P.S. Can I just say I'm very proud of myself for having blogged FOUR days in a row?!)

Fallen Princesses

2009-06-24T15:31:00.005-04:00

Obviously, in light of what I write, this series of photographs by Dina Goldstein called Fallen Princesses is totally up my alley.

And because I feel SO guilty about not blogging.

2009-06-23T09:34:00.002-04:00

...I'm going to do two posts.

So here's the Picture of the Day. Taken by yours truly on a rainy (what else is new?) Sunday morning about a month ago.

My official-start-of-summer-even-if-you'd-never-know-it-by-the-weather resolution...to blog EVERY DAY for a month.

2009-06-23T09:24:00.004-04:00

Yeah, well, we'll see if that actually happens.
But it sounds good.

That being said, I'm reading one of those completely delicious, don't-ever-want-it-to-end-and-kinda-pissed-you-do-have-to-put-it-down-because-you-have-to-go-write-your-OWN-book books.

It's called THE ELEGANCE OF THE HEDGEHOG by Muriel Barbery and it's a-ma-zing. I haven't loved a book this much since KAFKA ON THE SHORE by Haruki Murakami. (Even though this year I did become a huge Anna Gavalda fan.

Anyway, it's just great.

To make up for being such a horrible blogger...

2009-06-22T15:55:00.008-04:00

....I have two gifts for you:

Okay, so as many of you know, when people ask me what I miss most about L.A., I tell them that in addition to Target, one of things I miss most is my 4:30pm M-W-F yoga class with Lucy Bivins. I know yoga's all about non-attachment, but I got very attached to Lucy. And ever since I moved to NY two years ago, I've felt like Goldilocks in terms of trying to find teachers I like. This one's too fast. This one's too slow. This one's just plain annoying. But I have to say that Katie Malachuk has become my favorite teacher in town. She's super knowledgeable and wise and funny and talks just the right amount. She teaches at the Downtown location of Yogaworks and you can see her schedule here

(BTW, I also like Keith Yzquierdo and Julie Marx a lot, too). (Oh, and I also like Paula Lynch but she teaches uptown and now that I live downtown I've become one of those annoying NYers who won't go north of 23rd Street. But she's really good and I used to take her all the time when I did live uptown.)

So one day during class she mentioned she had just written a book and because I'm nosy I said "So what's your book about?" and she told me it was called YOU'RE ACCEPTED: LOSE THE STRESS. DISCOVER YOURSELF. GET INTO THE COLLEGE THAT'S RIGHT FOR YOU and it's a guide to getting into college and it sounds really amazing. In fact, you preorder it from Amazon by clicking here.

So for you guys who are going to be applying to college, buy the book. Or even if you're long out of college, buy it anyway and give it to someone who will be.

And the second thing is this:

You have to watch this amazing talk by Elizabeth Gilbert, author of EAT PRAY LOVE about creativity. Every time I think it's all on me to figure this stuff out vis a vis the writing (or just, like, life in general), I watch this and I start to breathe again.

Okay, I feel like I've just earned some seriously good karma turning you guys on to this stuff.

Melissa and friends, where are you?

2009-05-15T09:53:00.003-04:00

So this morning I received this email from my agent:

I came into my office this morning to find a voice mail message from a squealing group of girls, the leader of which was one named Melissa, who said that they wanted to meet Robin Palmer. And then they hung up.

How much do I love that?!

Melissa and company, that totally made my day.

I hope you'll write me at robin@robinpalmeronline.com so I can tell you that.

A beautiful piece about an important subject...

2009-05-10T10:20:00.004-04:00

OK, so not the most uplifting thing you'll read today (at least I hope not) but this beautifully written piece in today's New York Times magazine by Daphne Merkin about her battle with depression is a great read.

I'm really glad this was published -- and as a cover story. Hopefully it will help to alleviate the shame and mystery over what sadly remains a taboo subject in our society.

If you love Judy Blume...

2009-05-06T19:39:00.004-04:00

....like I love Judy Blume, which, believe me, is so much that my next book is dedicated to her, please click here and show your support.

Semi-coherent musings on stuff...

2009-05-05T22:15:00.004-04:00

I forgot that that's the subtitle of this blog, which is good because it frees me up to just go on and on and not feel like I have to make much sense and not worry about whether there's a point to what I'm writing. Because, honestly, at 10:16pm after a long day of writing and working at MTV and staying on hold for 15 minutes with the IRS and eating gnocci for dinner, my brain is too fried to find a point to much other than crawling into bed. Even thought I specifically ordered a cup of (decaf) coffee at dinner so that I could stay up really, really late tonite. Like, say, until 11:30.

I'm going back to L.A. for Memorial Day weekend. It's only my second time back since I moved away. I don't miss L.A., but I do miss my friends so I'm excited to see them. And I miss certain restaurants. And Target. And the 4:15 yoga class I used to take at Center For Yoga. And hiking in Fryman Canyon. And the coffee at Kings Road. And the coffee at Urth Caffe.

But I don't miss the traffic which, sadly, seems to be the first thing I think of when I think of L.A. and makes me want to stay away even longer.

Yesterday I was thinking about how people always say "Don't worry -- things will change" when you're going through something bad. Only the really misanthropes say it when you're in the good phases. But when the non-misanthropes say it, I smile and nod and say "I know, I know" but secretly I'm rolling my eyes (at least in my head) and thinking "But what if it doesn't? What if the way it is at this moment is the way it's going to be forever and ever and ever and it's like a Beckett play? Because that would just SUCK."

I said to someone the other day "The two words I use the most are 'always' and 'never'." As in "It's ALWAYS going to be this way" and "It's NEVER going to change." But that's just the leftover drama queen in me. The truth is, it ALWAYS changes...sometimes it just takes a while.

The reason I was thinking about this whole always-never thing is because there were a bunch of years in L.A. towards the end where I really struggled. Like really, REALLY struggled. I had left the executive ranks to write and the writing didn't come together as quickly as I hoped (like, say, the next day) and I blew through all my money, and I was doing a bunch of horrible odd jobs -- including putting Christmas gift baskets together at this catering company and working at an advertising agency where the minute I'd get in my car after work I'd start to cry - all because I wanted to write. And I WAS writing -- I just wasn't getting paid for the writing. And I had to sell all my fancy designer shoes on eBay so I could pay my rent (it wasn't like I needed to be wearing Manolo Blahniks with my yoga pants to type) and there were times I'd go to the supermarket and I'd hold my breath as the cashier was ringing up my stuff because every penny counted. And I'd lie awake at night trying to Figure It All Out until I got exhausted trying to Figure It All Out and when I stopped trying to Figure It All Out then some crazy little miracle would happen and I'd get a freelance writing gig that paid just the amount of money I needed to pay my bills for the month. Not a penny more, but just enough.

So it always had this way of working out, but it was very, very stressful. And people would say to me "Don't worry--it won't always be like this" and I'd smile and nod but inside I was saying "Yeah, well, it's been like this for YEARS now so I'm not quite sure why and when you think it's going to change, but whatever -- if saying that somehow makes you feel better, then knock yourself out."

And then...it did. It wasn't like the change happened in one day, because it didn't. It happened over time. Like over the course of three years. It just got a little bit better, and then a little bit better, and a little bit better until finally I felt like I was on semi-solid footing. I say semi-solid because the truth is we're never on solid footing (hello, recession). It's not like I'm rich or anything, because I'm not, but I also no longer hold my breath when I go to the supermarket any longer. And if I want to buy three pairs of $19.50 sandals at Old Navy now instead of one, I do it without feeling guilty. But here's the thing - what I know now is that if for some reason, I end up back in that place -- not that I have any interest in that happening because I don't - but if I did, I do know that it wouldn't stay like that forever. I know that it would change. Eventually. Not as fast as I'd like it to, because I tend to be one of those people for whom instant gratification takes too long, but I do know that I could sit through it until it did without feeling like I was going to die any minute from the fear and uncertainty.

I have no idea what any of this has to do with anything. Probably because I'm going back to the scene of the crime, so to speak. But I guess what I want to say is that if you're going through something that sucks, keep going.

And if you're rolling your eyes as you read that, that's cool. I get it. Because if I were you, I'd be doing the same thing. In fact, I did the same thing just this weekend when I was talking to a friend about something and she said "Don't worry--it'll change." Luckily I was on the phone rather than sitting across the table from her at a restaurant so she couldn't see me.

So roll your eyes, or - even better - say out loud "Who the hell is this chick spouting all this Pollyanna b.s.?" Because you can do whatever you want - it's still going to change.

Titles, Book Festivals - all that good stuff

2009-05-02T14:22:00.005-04:00

Okay, first of all, we now have an official title for my new book that will be out next February:

LITTLE MISS RED

Cute, huh? I wish I could say I came up with it, but I didn't because I totally suck at titles. I don't even PRETEND to be good at them. I think Jen, my editor, came up with it.

It's a retelling LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD, so it makes sense. I saw an early version of the cover and it's very cute. I'll post it here as soon as I get the okay.

If you live in New York and you're looking for something to do on Saturday, May 16th, then come to the Millbrook Book Festival in beautiful Dutchess County. Check out the schedule of events -- I think it'll be really fun. Plus I'll be on a panel there from 3:15 -4:00 so you can come and ask me all sorts of questions which I will gladly answer.

Also, if you live in Chicago, I'll be at the Chicago Tribune Printer's Row Lit Fest the weekend of June 6-7. More info on that to come.

I've been a horrible blogger, I know. And I know that's like the seventeenth time I've written that sentence. More later...I promise. xx

I don't think I've ever been nominated for ANYTHING before this...

2009-04-17T15:14:00.006-04:00

Why Today is a Very Good Day:

1. As evidenced by the abundant sunshine and the fact that I got to leave my coat at home today, it's finally spring.

2. I bought a pair of old school Dr. Scholl's sandals (red, natch).

3. I'm drinking a Tab.

4. GEEK CHARMING WAS NOMINATED FOR THE 2009 YALSA TEENS' TOP 10 LIST !!!!

If you click here, you can read about what the Teens' Top 10 List is and if you click here, you can see the entire list of nominees.

Teen Vogue Haute Spot at Short Hills Mall

2009-04-14T15:11:00.004-04:00

So I'll be at the Teen Vogue Haute Spot at the Short Hills Mall in Short Hills, NJ this coming Wednesday, April 22nd at 5pm to talk about GEEK CHARMING.

Penguin Book Reading: Robin Palmer’s Geek Charming
When: Wednesday, April 22nd, 5:00 P.M.
Come hear author/screenwriter Robin Palmer discuss her LA fairytale bestseller, “Geek Charming”—a “Clueless” meets the “Frog Prince” look at LA high school popularity. In addition to an author Q&A, a TEEN VOGUE Merchandising Editor will be on hand to help you put together your own “happily-ever-after” spring look.

If you're around come by.

And I just realized if I'm showing up for Teen Vogue, I should probably actually put a presentable outfit together....hmmmm.. Note that a Teen Vogue Merchandising Editor will help you put an outfit together - not me - because the older I get, the more that talent has shriveled up and died.

Good news to come

2009-03-28T10:04:00.003-04:00

I keep thinking I'll wait and write when I have including exciting news to report....like, say, 1) I won the lottery, or 2) Seth Rogen left his girlfriend for me...but neither of those have happened 1) because I've never bought a lottery ticket in my life and 2) because other than seeing me in the post office on Fairfax Avenue the day before I moved from L.A, all sweaty and gross because I was frantically running around town doing the stuff that one does when one is organizationally-challenged and about to move one's life of 17 years across the country, Seth Rogen does not know I exist.

The truth is, as I think I said in my last post, I've pretty much been writing. Throw in some yoga classes, dinners with friends, some trips to the dry cleaner and the supermarket, afternoons at MTV, but, yeah, it's mostly been about the writing. I'm just finishing up the last revision on the next fairy tale retelling which will go to copyediting next week. It's a retelling of LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD and because I have the best editor in the world - Jennifer Bonnell - and because her colleague Kristin Gilson is also incredibly astute at her job - the book is in really good shape. It's about a high school junior who's a bit of a drama queen (okay, so maybe not a bit....maybe a MAJOR one) and in love with the idea of love and meets a guy on a plane on her way to her grandmother's house.

Let's just say that it saved me thousands of dollars in therapy as it allowed me to work out my feelings and get some closure on a certain relationship with a certain person of the opposite sex I recently had. I have to say, writing's pretty great when not only do you get to do THAT but you also EARN a few bucks in the process.

So I've been doing that, and I've been working on YOURS TRULY, LUCY B. PARKER which is my new middle grade series which I'm very excited about.

Wow - just got some fabulous news - like LITERALLY just got it - but can't talk about it....but it's pretty awesome. Hopefully will be posting about it in a few weeks.

Oh wait - I DO have some news...I don't have all the specifics yet, but if you live near the Short Hills Mall in Short Hills, NJ, I will be there on April 22nd, come by to the Teen Vogue Haute Spot where I will be there with GEEK CHARMING.

There's nothing else to say...

2009-03-18T22:05:00.002-04:00

...I'm the worst blogger in the entire world.

I know.

I'm just so BUSY. Which I'm not complaining about because God knows I had years where I was most definitely NOT busy...and that pretty much sucked.

But it's about balance. Of which I have very little at the moment.

That being said, that horrible tragedy that happened yesterday with Natasha Richardson has been a huge eye-opener. A person's life can change - or be over - in a minute.

So why am I spending all my time indoors writing? Especially now that spring is almost officially here. (maybe not temperature-wise, but at least calendar-wise).

Anyway. Yeah -- go live your life. I'm going to.

Yet more about me-me-me-me-me

2009-02-26T21:33:00.003-05:00

My posting habits have been atrocious -- mainly because I've been so busy writing. But someone sent this to me and I figured instead of being creative and coming up with something original, instead I'd be ultra lame and just answer these questions.

1) Are you currently in a serious relationship?

Other than with my new book? No. I'm not even in an UNserious relationship at the moment.

2) What was your dream growing up?

My dream was...drumroll please...to write books. Look at that -- it came true!

3) What talent do you wish you had?

I wish I knew how to play piano.

4) If I bought you a drink what would it be?

In the summer? Iced tea. In the winter? A nonfat cappucino.

5) Favorite vegetable?

As of this year, beets. Crazy, huh? I spent the 39 previous years avoiding them like the plague.

6) What was the last book you read?

I re-read PLAY IT AS IT LAYS by Joan Didion for like the 10th time. Favorite. Book. Ever.

7) What zodiac sign are you?

First day of Aquarius. Taurus rising. PIsces moon. Venus in Pisces. Oh, and 6 planets in the 12th house. Now you know exactly why I am the way I am.

8) Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? Explain where.

Two tattoos. One is the Chinese symbol for strength and it's right above my left hipbone. The other is on my lower back (a.k.a. trampstamp) and it's a fleur-de-lys in the middle of a butterfly.

9) Worst Habit?

Worrying that it's all going to fall apart five minutes from now.

10) What is your favorite sport?

Yoga's not a sport, is it? It it were, it would be yoga. To watch, I'd say tennis and basketball.

11) Do you have a Pessimistic or Optimistic attitude?

It depends on where I am in my menstrual cycle. But I guess in general I would call myself an optimist who has to work hard to keep her pessimistic leanings in check.

12) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator?

Try not to worry that I was going to use all the oxygen up. (see questions 9 and 11)

13) Worst thing to ever happen to you?

My mother dying when I was six.

14) What's one weird fact about you?

Just one? Hmm...I've lived in NYC for a year and a half and I've only been in a cab 4 times?

15) Do you have any pets?

Two cats. O'Neill, who is named after Eugene and is the sweetest thing in the entire world although he has a perpetually worried look on his face; and Onyx, who I'm pretty sure has Aspergers Syndrome. It's her world and O'Neill and I are just lucky to live in it.

16) What would you do if someone showed up at your house unexpectedly?

Offer them some water.

17) Do you think clowns are cute or scary?

Neither. I think they're annoying.

18) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?

Seeing that I've worked incredibly hard on self-acceptance over the last decade, I'm gonna go with nothing.

19) Are you more a partner-in-crime or conscience?

Depends on the day.

20) What color eyes do you have?

Blue

21) Ever been arrested?

Nope

22) Bottle or can soda?

As Tab only comes in cans and it's my favorite, I'm gonna say can.

23) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it?

Put it towards a down payment on a house in upstate NY or western MA.

24) What's your favorite place to hang out?

Central Park

25) Do you believe in ghosts?

Yes

26) Favorite thing to do in your spare time?

What spare time?

27) Do you swear a lot?

I go in phases. The last few days, yes.

28) Biggest pet peeve?

People who are self-absorbed and narcissistic.

29) In one word, how would you describe yourself?

Grateful.

30) Do you believe/appreciate romance?

Hmm...I appreciate it, but the the older I get and the more research I do and read, I don't believe in it in the way that Hallmark sells it to us. What people think of as romance and true love is actually a hormonal, chemical reaction to a human being and a host of projections that, after about 3 months, begin to be withdrawn, leaving us with realization that said human being is exactly that - a human being - which can be a total and complete bummer when you've been operating under the mistaken assumption that they're perfect. It's only when what we call "romance" is gone that it actually starts to become a relationship rather than just an infatuation. I think this is probably a much longer answer than anyone wanted to hear.

31) Favorite and least favorite food?

Favorite: cupcakes
Least Favorite: liver

32) Do you believe in God?

I believe in a force that is much greater and much wiser than my finite self. But do I believe in God in the traditional sense as an old man with a beard sitting on a throne in judgement of me? No.

Be my friend...

2009-02-21T07:39:00.003-05:00

....on Facebook by clicking here

I know there's an easy way to do this, but because A) it's 7:40am on a Saturday morning and I've only had half a cup of coffee and B) I'm technologically challenged anyway, I don't know how to do it.

In other news, check back soon because Dylan from GEEK CHARMING will have her own blog!

Angry Little Girls make me happy

2009-02-13T21:57:00.004-05:00

How did I not know about the Angry Little Girls until today???

As Liz Lemon would say, "I want to go to there."

Something to keep in mind...

2009-02-12T16:15:00.002-05:00

If you've read GEEK CHARMING and you liked it, if you'd be kind enough to post a review on Amazon or Barnes & Noble, I'd so appreciate the feedback.

Thank you
xx

Oh, Joni, I could drink a case of you...

2009-02-11T21:27:00.005-05:00

If anyone wants to get me a gift, you can get me this...

I so want to come back as Joni Mitchell in my next lifetime.

How much do I love Shari Stack and the kids at Mepham High?!

2009-02-10T20:07:00.007-05:00

Okay, so usually when I do a Q&A after a reading, I get stuff like "Can you describe your writing process?" (um, no--not because I'm being secretive but because the whole thing is completely mystifying) and "What's a typical day like in a writer's life?" (for the most part, very boring...and usually includes coffee, yoga pants and - when writing is not going well - various tasks that have to be done THAT VERY MOMENT like the removal of nail polish and looking up long lost friends from fifth grade on Facebook).

However, yesterday when I spoke to the kids at Mepham High in Bellmore, New York, I was asked by Sara Kulins "So in your book CINDY ELLA, Cindy believes in soulmates...do you believe in soulmates?

What a GREAT question. So much more interesting than "What do you wear when you write?" (see first paragraph for answer). My answer was yes...and no. Yes, I believe in the concept of soulmates, but I don't believe we have just one and I definitely don't think, if we come across one, that means we're guaranteed to stay with them forever. Sadly, I'm pretty certain about that second part...*sigh*.

Anyway, I had a great time during the visit, and I was especially touched by this fabulous larger-than-life rendition of the cover of CINDY ELLA by the fabulously talented Chrissy Hirsch. I also got to spend the day with my incredible publisher, Eileen Kreit, who is a graduate of Mepham. Turns out we graduated the same year, and as we looked through her yearbook I saw the kids there looked exactly like that did at mine -- TONS of HUGE hair.

I'll be going back to Mepham for the new member induction of the National English Honor Society on March 10th - can't wait!

GEEK CHARMING ARRIVES IN STORES TODAY

2009-02-05T06:47:00.002-05:00

Thrilled to report that GEEK CHARMING is now available in bookstores.

Or you can order online at:

http://www.amazon.com/Geek-Charming-Robin-Palmer/dp/0142411221

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Geek-Charming/Robin-Palmer/e/9780142411223/?itm=1

I'm finishing up the revision on the NEXT one, which is why I've been such a bad blogger, but hope to come up for air soon.

Enjoy the book...

xx

25 Things..

2009-01-31T08:42:00.004-05:00

This is going around Facebook and, this morning, because I was looking for an excuse for not doing my work, I decided to come up with 25 random facts about me.

Once you've been tagged you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to "notes" under tabs, on your profile, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people, then click publish)

1. I'm colorblind.

2. When I was five, I changed my name to Thumbelina for two days and would not answer to anything else.

3. I'm still bummed that, in a fit of pride and a desire to prove my maturity, I threw my blankie out when I was seven and that by the time I came to my senses, the garbage man had already taken it away.

4. I can't believe I was a blonde for all those years. I'm so a brunette at heart.

5. I'm never happier or feel like I'm more myself than when I'm writing. Even on the days when it's not going well.

6. At some point I'd love to go to Pacifica University and get my degree in Depth Psychology and become a Jungian psychoanalyst in addition to writing.

7. I'd like to live in Paris for a while.

8. My dream is to be able to split my time between Manhattan and a house in upstate New York or western MA.

9. I'm incredibly disorganized.

10. As moderation is not one of my strong suits, I can't keep a box of cookies in the house without eating the whole thing.

11. I studied French for 12 years but have a horrible accent so I'm self-conscious about speaking.

12. If I had a daughter, I'd name her Clementine.

13. One day a few years ago when I was questioning whether I was on the right track with the writing, I was walking down 3rd Ave and I said to myself "I need a sign" and a black Towncar pulled up and Joan Didion got out. The next day I started writing CINDY ELLA, which became my first published novel.

14. I have two tattoos.

15. I could listen to Joni Mitchell and Miles Davis all day.

16. If I have learned anything, it's that everything passes. Most of the time not as quickly as I'd like, but it does pass.

17. I'm somewhat shocked at how many of my dreams have proved to be prescient.

18. I'm pretty sure one of my cats has Aspergers Syndrome.

19. I used to smoke a pack and a half a day for 15 years.

20. I really have no interest in cooking.

21. I was almost the Johnson & Johnson No More Tangles girl.

22. I've only been in a cab 4 times since I moved to New York. My favorite thing about living here is that I get to walk so much.

23. I tend to eat the same thing for lunch every day until I burn out on it completely. This month it's Amy's Brown Rice Bowls.

24. Sometimes in yoga, when it comes time to do crow pose, I say a very un-yogic "F*ck" under my breath because all these years later, I still can't do it.

25. I am incredibly happy and content in my life at the moment - and it's taken every day of the last 40 years to get here.

Publishers Weekly review of GEEK CHARMING

2009-01-26T17:16:00.002-05:00

I have to say, it was hard to leave 82 degree-Turks & Caicos weather to return to 28-degree Manhattan, but this review as a welcome home gift made it a lot easier...

Geek Charming Robin Palmer. Speak, $7.99 paper (352p) ISBN 978-0-14-241122-3

The perils of popularity are showcased in a lighthearted contemporary novel filled with snappy dialogue. The fun begins when A-lister Dylan drops her designer handbag in a mall’s fountain. Her geeky classmate Josh rescues it, and to return the favor, Dylan (reluctantly) agrees to star in his USC application film, documenting the “the inner workings of the in crowd” at Castle Heights High. Told from the alternating perspectives of the two teens, the story traces Dylan’s fall from grace as her friends recognize her back-stabbing tendencies around the same time she is dumped by her handsome boyfriend. Her trials parallel Josh’s rise in social status when Dylan gives him a makeover. Readers will likely feel more for Josh than for Dylan in the beginning (although his hypochondria does prove annoying), yet aspects of Dylan—even her shallowness—become increasingly endearing as her vulnerabilities come to light. Rather than following the predictable route of having opposites fall in love, Palmer (Cindy Ella) offers a slightly more original and plausible alternative. Ages 12–up. (Feb.

40 is the new 30...

2009-01-18T08:58:00.005-05:00

I actually wrote a book with that title once. Actually, it was called 30 is the New 40. I think. It was a while ago so I don't remember.

Anyway, my 40th is on Wednesday but I had a party last night that was great. If you are my friend on Facebook, you can see them there. I'm posting only 2 here. Because the cupcakes are inanimate objects, they can't demand photo approval.

I had waaaay too many cupcakes, but it was well worth it

I'm still around...

2009-01-16T09:31:00.003-05:00

...just not blogging a lot.

I can't believe the last time was Xmas.

Not even a Happy New Year post.

Sorry about that.

Lots going on. GEEK CHARMING pubs on February 5th which is so exciting, but before that I have my birthday party tomorrow night, my 40th birthday next Wednesday (40...how on EARTH did that happen?!) and then a much-needed vacation to Parrot Cay on Turks & Caicos for four days. I haven't been on a vacation like that since Mexico with my ex-boyfriend Alex when I was 26 and he got food poisoning and I got sun poisoning and we spent the entire time watching HBO in the room.

It's freezing in New York today. When the New York Times says "bitterly cold" and "frigid" on the front page you know you're in trouble. I wish it would snow more though... We've gotten a little bit over the last few weeks but it never sticks. Meanwhile it' been in the 80s in L.A. Crazy.

I'm excited for GEEK to come out and start doing signings. Will post dates on my website when that's all figured out.

My father is in the process of transferring over stuff on VHS tapes to DVDs and the other day he told me that he found footage from his 50th birthday party in Las Vegas where I'm sitting there smoking a cigarette and saying to the camera that I'm "20 and a half years old."

Cigarettes. 20 and a half.

Both such a long, long time ago.

40 always seemed so old to me. It meant kids, and mortgages, and the suburbs. It didn't mean writing novels and living in downtown NYC and going to yoga and not smoking.

It's all good. Different than I thought, but all good.

MERRY CHRISTMAS...

2008-12-25T07:08:00.002-05:00

Not much else to say today other than that, is there?

Except maybe Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa (a day early), Happy Holidays.

Anyway, whatever you are celebrating, I hope it's lovely.

If you're in NY on February 11...

2008-12-20T12:58:00.002-05:00

....come see me read from GEEK CHARMING as part of the fantastic Teen Author Reading Night series that writer/editor/cruise director David Levithan organizes each month.

Here are the deets:

When: February 11
6-7:30pm

Where: Jefferson Market Branch of NYPL
425 6th Ave, at 10th St

Who: Madeleine George, Looks
Robin Palmer, Geek Charming
Lynn Weingarten, Wherever Nina Lies

We interrupt this program for some shameless self-promotion

2008-12-07T19:24:00.004-05:00

As it's officially freezing - at least here in NYC - chances are you have no interest in leaving your house to go holiday shopping. Chances are you'd like to do all your shopping online and buy the people you care about....a book. Probably a fun book. With a sparkly cover.

Guess what? You're in luck.

Because I know of TWO books with sparkly covers that you could buy said people you care about without leaving the house.

One is Cindy Ella and the other one is Geek Charming.

Now, Geek Charming isn't actually going to be released until February 5th, but that's actually good, because that means that those people you care about will have something to look forward to. Chances are they'll get a bunch of other gifts around the holidays, so in a way, you'll get extra bonus points because your gift will arrive when they're in the zenith of post holiday depression and really need to be cheered up. And studies have shown that books with sparkly covers have the same effect as 100 mg of Prozac.

Better yet, look at this way: you're actually buying two people holiday gifts: the person who will be receiving the book with the sparkly cover and me, the author.

I thank you in advance for your gift.

And now we return to our regular scheduled programming.

Too cute...

2008-12-04T16:20:00.004-05:00

Love this.

But I have to admit that if I weren't already a published author, I'd be jealous. Who cares if he's only nine and totally adorable? It's every man/kid for himself out there...

Okay, so they're not Prada or Gucci....

2008-12-01T16:02:00.010-05:00

which is what I was partial to back when I was a high heel kind of girl, but maybe I should ask Jessica Simpson for a blurb?

The shoes on the cover of GEEK CHARMING, which I blogged about a few posts down? Turns out they're from her line.

Click here to read.

Let's hope the book gets as much press as the shoes.

So that you don't miss a single word I type...

2008-11-25T13:27:00.003-05:00

...okay, why I think reading my words is all that interesting to you, I have no idea but it was the best title for this post that I could come up with.

Anyway, you can now "follow" my blog by clicking on the right. That way, whenever I post something new you'll be alerted. Not that anything I write here is all that interesting, but it'll give you something to do if you're, you know, trying to avoid doing your work.

Whatever it takes to get readers...

2008-11-22T13:20:00.003-05:00

Click here and scroll halfway down to read about what Elizabeth Bird had to say about GEEK CHARMING.

Or, more specifically, what she had to say about the shoes on the cover.

For those who knew me way back when, when I had a slight problem managing and controlling my designer shoe consumption, they'll see the humor.

I can't even remember the last time I wore a pair of Manolos. Now it's all about Chuck Taylors and Frye motorcycle boots.

That's either about old age or wisdom, depending on the day.

Tragedy + Time = Comedy

2008-11-18T21:27:00.010-05:00

Summing up a relationship--or, in this case, the demise of a relationship--in six words may not be easy, but the good news is that trying to is kind of like playing with one of those Rubik's cubes: providing you with infinite possibilities and hours of entertainment. Not to mention hours of diversion from the writing for which you're actually getting paid.

My six-word memoir on love and heartache will be appearing in Six-Word Memoirs on Love and Heartache: by Writers Famous and Obscure, (obviously I'm more on the "obscure" end of the scale) which will be released in January. Oh, and if you haven't figured it out from the picture above, I chose the heartache option because, as they say, "tragedy plus time equals comedy."

I'm not going to tell you what my six words were, because if I do, then you won't click here and order a copy.

Here's how I'll be spending my next five summer vacations...

2008-11-15T10:01:00.002-05:00

Okay, some very cool and exciting news to report.

This appeared in Publishers Marketplace today:

CHILDREN'S: MIDDLE GRADE
Author of CINDY ELLA and the upcoming GEEK CHARMING Robin Palmer's YOURS TRULY, LUCY B. PARKER, about a 12-year-old girl whose new stepsister isn't just pretty and popular, she's a Hannah Montana-type superstar, so Lucy emails a Dr. Phil-like celebrity therapist for advice, to Jennifer Bonnell and Eileen Kreit at Puffin, in a five-book deal, for publication in Fall 2010, by Kate Lee at ICM (World English).

I'm beyond thrilled about this. In fact, this blogging post is but a mere short commercial break before I return to working on the first book.

I've just done your holiday shopping for you...

2008-11-03T09:21:00.007-05:00

Let me start out by saying that I'm a little prejudiced when it comes to this book due to the fact that the fabulous AstroTwins, Ophira and Tali Edut, are friends of mine. That being said, I've been known to have spent more than a few minutes over the years in the Astrology section of the bookstore -- especially after finding out the sign of a guy I like. (I can't believe I just admitted that in print)

So you can believe me when I say that I know when an astrology book is right on, and when it's cheesy.

And you can believe me when I tell you that The AstroTwins' Love Zodiac is not only right on in terms of how they nail the different signs, but it's also hip and wry and funny. Just like the Twins themselves.

You can click here to read an excerpt and see what I'm talking about.

Think of how easy it will be to do your holiday shopping this year: all you have to do is go to Amazon and order twenty or so copies for your girlfriends and you'll be all set.

And I will leave you with this...

Everything they say about Sag men?

Completely on the money.

Believe me, I know of which I speak.

What I'm Doing When I'm Not Coming Up With Witty Entries To Entertain You...

2008-11-03T09:09:00.004-05:00

When I'm not updating my blog, I'm usually avoiding my own writing by reading other people's blogs.

Recently I was asked to be a guest blogger on blogs.com with my top 10 blog picks.

As I'm currently obsessed with decorating my apartment, I've been spending way too much time looking at paint colors and overpriced furniture. Hence, my mindset when they asked for my list.

Click here to see it.

Keep Your Glass Slipper...I'd Rather Wear Flip-Flops

New tumblr post...

Go to my Tumblr....

I've got a Tumblr now.

I've figured out the secret to a happy life...

Bored?

Bored?

TV Development 101

Geek Charming - The Movie!

When I've used my words up...

Merry/Happy/Bonne/Feliz etc....

Pretty

Home

Satire? Irony? Parody? Anyone?

Am I the only blogger...

The Way I Am

Blogging...

Another great review of LUCY...

And now..an important public service announcement.

Yay, Lucy!

Sadly, it's come to this...

Lucy B. is here...

Lucy B. Parker website is up & running...

Lucy B. review!

Come see me!

Lucy B. Parker is Tweeting....

How to Avoid Writing

I'm alive....

My co-writer

More videos from my favorite reviewer...

Fun news

Back when I was young...

I am an emotional creature...

Take the quiz...

Oh right.

Happy Pub Day, Little Miss Red!

My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

Hmm...

My 15 minutes of fame...

Once upon a time...

Have you ordered your copy of Little Miss Red yet?

Ciao...mi chiamo Robin e scrivo romanzi....

Little Miss Red reading in NYPL on January 6th

Tweet this

Smart Girls at the Party

This makes me laugh so hard.

Very intrigued by this white stuff.

First snow of the winter! First time I've blogged in over a month!

Crazy small world story...

What I Did This Weekend by Robin Palmer

To Write Love On Her Arms Day

I heart Philip Roth

Happy accidents..

Things are getting wacky at Casa del Palmer...

If you're bored...

Announcing the arrival of LUCY B. PARKER....

Obviously I was given a lobotomy while I was sleeping...

Soup update....

Big day today....

Why is it so hard for me to blog on a regular basis?

Oh, how true...

For some reason tweeting makes me feel like a twit...

GEEK has made it to the Top 10 of YALSA's 2009 Teens' Top 10 List!

One of my favorite poems....

We love Disney Channel...

"One is not born a woman, one becomes one"...with the help of this very cool t-shirt.

Fallen Princesses

And because I feel SO guilty about not blogging.

My official-start-of-summer-even-if-you'd-never-know-it-by-the-weather resolution...to blog EVERY DAY for a month.

To make up for being such a horrible blogger...

Melissa and friends, where are you?

A beautiful piece about an important subject...

If you love Judy Blume...

Semi-coherent musings on stuff...

Titles, Book Festivals - all that good stuff

I don't think I've ever been nominated for ANYTHING before this...

Teen Vogue Haute Spot at Short Hills Mall

Good news to come

There's nothing else to say...

Yet more about me-me-me-me-me